Communication Styles page
Learn how to understand yourself, understand others, and adapt your communication style.
Communication styles
Communication styles refer to how people express themselves, both verbally and nonverbally. Understanding these styles helps reduce misunderstandings and build stronger relationships with colleagues, clients, and managers.
Personality trait models
Personality models, like the Big Five, focus on traits that stay consistent over time.
- Stable: Traits are consistent across different situations.
- Internal: Traits reflect inherent tendencies.
- Predictable: They help forecast how someone will generally act.
- Descriptive: Traits describe “what” a person is like.
- Universal: Traits apply broadly across contexts.
They provide general insights into behavior but are less useful in predicting real-time communication.
Behavior style models
Behavior models focus on how people act in specific situations. These models explain how people adjust their behavior based on the context.
- Situational: Behavior changes based on environment.
- Observable: Behavior is visible and measurable.
- Adaptable: People adjust their behavior to fit in.
- Action-oriented: Focuses on how people act.
- Variable: Behavior can change frequently.
Behavior models may oversimplify human behavior and aren’t always reliable for long-term predictions, but they serve as helpful, flexible tools for everyday communication. They offer a shared, straightforward way to discuss preferences without diving into complex theories.
The key benefit is their flexibility — allowing you to adjust your communication style based on the situation. If someone prefers concise answers, keep it brief; if they favor open-ended conversations, ask more questions. This adaptability smooths interactions and is especially valuable for consultants working with new teams and clients who need to build rapport quickly.
Comparing popular behavior models
Behavior Styles | DISC | Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) | Social Styles |
---|---|---|---|
Doer | Dominance (D) | ESTJ, ENTJ, ESTP, ENTP (Extraverted, Thinking) | Driving |
Talker | Influence (I) | ESFP, ENFP, ESFJ, ENFJ (Extraverted, Feeling) | Expressive |
Supporter | Steadiness (S) | ISFP, INFP, ISFJ, INFJ (Introverted, Feeling) | Amiable |
Controller | Conscientiousness (C) | ISTJ, INTJ, ISTP, INTP (Introverted, Thinking) | Analytical |
This table compares four popular behavior style models: Integrity Solutions’ Behavior Styles, DISC, MBTI (Myers-Briggs Type Indicator), and Social Styles. Each model categorizes individuals based on their communication, decision-making, and interaction tendencies. While these models use different terminology and frameworks, they roughly align in their groupings of individuals by behavior.
Direct vs. indirect communication
Direct communication
Direct communication is clear, straightforward, and often more assertive. People who tend toward direct communication prefer to get straight to the point, focus on facts, and may use a more confident or commanding tone. In a spectrum, this is one end, where clarity and brevity are highly valued.
Observable behaviors:
- Makes statements or requests without hesitation.
- Uses concise, straightforward language.
- Focuses on facts and logic rather than emotions.
- Frequently uses strong, assertive language (e.g., “I want,” “I need”).
- May interrupt or take control of conversations to ensure points are made.
- Often quick to make decisions and take action.
- Prefers efficiency and tends to dislike small talk.
- May come across as blunt or overly candid.
Indirect communication
Indirect communication, on the other end of the spectrum, involves more subtlety and nuance. Indirect communicators tend to soften their language, often prioritizing the feelings of others and context over the content of the message. They may avoid conflict by phrasing things gently or using hints.
Observable behaviors:
- Uses more polite, softened, or vague language (e.g., “Maybe we could,” “What do you think about…”).
- Reluctant to express disagreement or make demands.
- Often couches requests in questions or suggestions.
- Uses body language or tone to hint at deeper meaning.
- Frequently seeks consensus or approval from others before making decisions.
- Avoids conflict or confrontation.
- Tends to use more qualifiers, such as “perhaps” or “possibly.”
- Prefers a slower pace of conversation and decision-making.
Open vs. guarded communication
Open communication
Open communication is characterized by a willingness to share personal feelings, opinions, and information. People who are more open tend to be transparent and expressive, comfortable with revealing their thoughts and experiences. On a spectrum, this represents individuals who are easy to “read” and who value openness in others.
Observable behaviors:
- Freely shares personal information and experiences.
- Expresses emotions openly and comfortably.
- Frequently asks for feedback or input from others.
- Shows visible interest in connecting with others on a personal level.
- Is enthusiastic about collaboration and brainstorming.
- Uses expressive body language (e.g., open posture, smiles, gestures).
- Tends to be approachable and seeks to establish rapport.
- Shows empathy and encourages others to share their feelings.
Guarded communication
Guarded communication, on the other end of the spectrum, reflects a more private or reserved approach. People who are guarded often keep personal information to themselves, are more selective in what they share, and may appear more cautious or detached.
Observable behaviors:
- Rarely shares personal thoughts or feelings.
- Maintains a neutral or closed-off demeanor.
- Prefers to focus on tasks or facts rather than personal topics.
- Uses limited or minimal body language.
- Avoids discussing emotions or deep topics, especially with those they don’t know well.
- May deflect personal questions or shift the conversation to others.
- Keeps professional and personal life distinctly separated.
- Appears more cautious and deliberate in how they communicate.
Understanding the spectrums
Both direct vs. indirect and open vs. guarded represent spectrums, not binary categories. People can shift along these spectrums depending on the context (e.g., work vs. home), the relationship with the other person, or the situation at hand.
- Direct and indirect refer to how people communicate — whether they get straight to the point or approach things more subtly.
- Open and guarded refer to what they share — whether they freely share personal feelings and opinions or keep them more private.
Each person may display varying levels of directness and openness, depending on circumstances:
- Highly direct and open: Tends to be very expressive, sharing opinions and feelings with little hesitation.
- Highly direct and guarded: Communicates clearly and assertively but keeps personal details private.
- Indirect and open: May share personal experiences but does so in a softer, more cautious way.
- Indirect and guarded: Offers little personal information and communicates subtly, often prioritizing harmony and avoiding conflict.
These spectrums help us understand the nuances of communication and interaction in different settings, allowing for more adaptable and effective communication strategies.
Observing communication styles
You can identify communication styles by paying attention to:
- Tone of voice: Formal, casual, encouraging, or direct?
- Pacing: Fast or slow talker?
- Body language: Do they gesture or stay reserved?
- Formality: Structured or relaxed in conversation?
Observing these cues helps you adapt your communication to match the other person’s style, leading to more productive conversations.
Behavioral clues
Behavioral clues give insight into whether someone is task-oriented or people-oriented and how they handle conflict or decision-making. This can help you collaborate more effectively with new teams or clients.
- Task vs. people-oriented: Focused on goals or relationships?
- Conflict resolution: Avoid, confront, or mediate?
- Decision-making: Quick or deliberate?
Adapting your communication
To communicate effectively, adjust your style without changing your personality. For example:
- Provide context to a detail-oriented person.
- Keep it brief with someone who values conciseness.
- Send written communication to those who prefer it over face-to-face meetings.
Small adjustments help build stronger relationships with clients and colleagues.
Cultural background and communication styles
Culture shapes communication styles, from directness to power dynamics. Here’s how culture impacts communication:
- Direct vs. indirect: Direct cultures (e.g., U.S., Germany) value clear communication. Indirect cultures (e.g., Asian, Latin American) rely on subtlety and context.
- High vs. low-context cultures: High-context cultures rely on non-verbal signals and shared experiences, while low-context cultures prioritize explicit communication.
- Power distance: High power distance cultures are more hierarchical, while low power distance cultures encourage open dialogue.
- Individualism vs. collectivism: Individualist cultures focus on self-expression, while collectivist cultures prioritize group harmony.
Understanding these cultural factors helps you tailor your communication style to fit the audience.
Understanding your audience
Your audience’s background, role, and level of technical expertise greatly influence how you should communicate with them. Understanding these differences is key to making sure your message is both clear and effective.
Communicating with technical vs. non-technical audiences
Technical audiences often seek detailed, data-driven information, while non-technical stakeholders usually need the broader context and implications of technical decisions.
For example, a technical stakeholder may want to know how a specific algorithm works, while a non-technical stakeholder, such as an executive, is more interested in understanding how the algorithm will impact business outcomes.
Tailoring your communication style and presentations to match the technical level of your audience: When presenting to technical stakeholders, use precise language, dive into technical details, and be prepared to answer in-depth questions. In contrast, when communicating with executives or other non-technical stakeholders, focus on the high-level impact, using visuals and simplified explanations to convey the message. For example, when explaining a new feature to a client’s CTO, you might discuss scalability and performance metrics. However, when explaining the same feature to a CEO, you might focus on how it will improve customer satisfaction or drive revenue.
Strategies for simplifying technical jargon without losing meaning or accuracy: To bridge the gap between technical and non-technical audiences, it’s important to distill complex concepts into simpler terms without oversimplifying. Use analogies, relatable examples, and clear definitions to explain technical terms.
For instance, instead of saying “low-latency,” you could say, “the system responds almost instantly, like when you click a link, and the page loads right away.” This keeps the essence of the technical detail while making it accessible.
Tips and techniques:
- Start with context: Before diving into details, give an overview of the problem or situation. This helps both technical and non-technical audiences understand the relevance of the information.
- Use layered communication: Begin with a high-level summary, then progressively dive into more detail. This approach allows your audience to stop you when they’ve received enough information.
- Pause for questions: Regularly check for understanding, especially with non-technical audiences. Ask open-ended questions like, “Does this make sense so far?” or “Would you like more detail on any part of this?”
- Use visual aids: Diagrams, flowcharts, and other visuals can help both technical and non-technical audiences grasp complex concepts more quickly.
Questions to reflect:
- How do you currently tailor your communication when speaking with technical versus non-technical stakeholders?
- Think of a recent interaction where you explained a technical concept. What worked well, and what could you have improved?
- Can you recall a time when a lack of understanding between technical and non-technical teams caused issues? How could communication have been improved in that situation?
Client vs. internal communication
Client communication often requires a higher level of formality and a focus on delivering value, while internal communication might be more collaborative and open. When dealing with clients, it’s important to maintain professionalism and align your messages with the client’s goals and expectations. Internally, the focus is on collaboration and keeping all team members aligned, which may involve more candid discussions and brainstorming sessions.
Techniques for maintaining clarity, professionalism, and alignment with organizational goals in client communications: Always start by understanding the client’s objectives and tailor your communication to show how your work supports these goals. Use clear, direct language, avoid unnecessary jargon, and make sure every interaction benefits the client relationship.
For example, when updating a client on project progress, provide clear status updates, highlight key achievements, and outline the next steps, keeping all communication aligned with the client’s strategic goals.
TODO: Cut this and move the useful advice (provide enough background info) into a section about asking for help. Internal communication best practices for cross-functional collaboration within Bitovi: When communicating internally, especially across different functions (e.g., a frontend developer working with a product designer), clarity and context are important. Provide enough background information so that team members from other disciplines can fully understand your perspective. Regular check-ins, using shared tools for tracking progress, and encouraging an open feedback culture are also essential. For example, a frontend developer should clearly explain how a design choice might affect the user experience or the ease of implementation, helping all team members collaborate effectively.
Tips and techniques:
- Establish client expectations early: During initial meetings, clarify the level of detail and formality your client expects. Adjust your communication style accordingly.
- Be a proactive communicator: For clients, send regular updates even if there’s nothing significant to report. This reassures them that you’re managing the project well. For internal teams, communicate frequently to maintain alignment.
- Document key discussions: Always follow up important client conversations with a summary email, capturing decisions made, next steps, and any action items. Internally, use shared tools to keep everyone in the loop.
Questions to reflect:
- How do you adjust your communication when switching from client interactions to internal team discussions?
- Think of a time when a project didn’t meet client expectations. How could better communication have changed the outcome?
- What strategies do you use to maintain clarity and alignment in both client and internal communications?
Adapting to communication preferences and cultural norms
Adapting your communication style based on individual preferences and cultural differences is vital in a diverse workplace. Being flexible and mindful of these factors can greatly enhance your effectiveness in any professional setting.
Adjusting directness and openness in communication
Not everyone appreciates the same level of directness in communication. Some cultures or individuals might prefer a more indirect approach, while others value directness. Adjust your style by observing your audience’s reactions and feedback.
For example, in cultures where direct communication is valued, you might give straightforward feedback, saying, “This approach needs revision because it doesn’t meet the requirements.” In contrast, in a culture that favors indirectness, you might say, “This is a good start, but perhaps we could explore other options to align it more closely with the goals.”
Understanding the impact of cultural differences on communication and how to navigate them effectively
Cultural norms play a significant role in communication preferences.
For example, in some cultures, direct criticism is seen as constructive, while in others, it can be perceived as rude. Understanding these differences helps in avoiding misunderstandings and building stronger relationships.
Research the cultural backgrounds of your clients or team members, and be mindful of things like tone, body language, and even timing of communication. For instance, in some cultures, decisions are made quickly and decisively, while in others, there may be a more extended consultation process.
Tips and techniques:
- Observe before acting: In meetings, observe how others communicate before jumping in. This will give you insights into preferred communication styles, whether direct or indirect.
- Use “I” statements: When giving feedback or suggestions, especially in cultures that favor indirect communication, use “I” statements to soften the delivery. For example, “I noticed that…” rather than “You need to…”.
- Mirror body language: Subtly mirror your audience’s body language to build rapport. This can help create a more comfortable environment for open communication.
- Ask for feedback on your communication style: Regularly ask colleagues or clients from different cultures how they perceive your communication. This can help you make necessary adjustments.
Questions to reflect:
- How comfortable are you with direct versus indirect communication? When have you had to adjust your natural style?
- Think of a situation where cultural differences impacted communication. How did you navigate that, and what did you learn?
- What steps do you take to make sure your communication is culturally sensitive and appropriate?
Code-switching (matching language and tone to your audience)
Code-switching involves changing your language, tone, and even behavior to suit different social contexts. In a professional environment, this means adapting how you communicate depending on your audience — whether you’re talking to a peer, a superior, a client, or someone from a different cultural background. This skill is particularly important in consulting, where you might shift between highly technical discussions with developers and strategic conversations with executives.
Practical strategies for adjusting language, tone, and formality depending on the audience and context: To effectively code-switch, first assess your audience’s expectations and preferences. With peers or team members, you might use more informal language and a collaborative tone. When speaking with clients or senior executives, you should adopt a more formal tone, use polished language, and focus on high-level impacts.
For example, when discussing project timelines with a client, you might say, “We expect to deliver this feature by the end of Q3,” whereas with your internal team, you might say, “Let’s aim to wrap this up by the end of September.”
Tips and techniques:
- Prepare phrases in advance: For formal situations, have a set of professional phrases ready to use. This can help you smoothly switch to a more formal tone when needed.
- Practice role-playing: Role-play different scenarios with colleagues to practice adjusting your tone and language depending on the audience.
- Use consistent key messages: While your tone may change, the core message should remain consistent. Practice delivering the same message with different levels of formality and complexity.
- Stay genuine: Even when code-switching, keep your communication authentic. Forced formality or informality can come across as insincere.
Questions to reflect:
- In what situations do you find yourself needing to code-switch the most? How do you adapt your language and tone?
- Reflect on a time when you successfully adjusted your communication style for a specific audience. What was the outcome?
- How can you improve your ability to code-switch without losing the authenticity of your message?
Simplifying complex ideas and using analogies
Simplifying complex ideas requires a deep understanding of the subject matter. Break down the concept into smaller, digestible parts and explain each in plain language. Use step-by-step explanations and check for understanding along the way.
For instance, when explaining how a blockchain works to a non-technical audience, you could describe it as a “digital ledger that records transactions in a way that makes them secure and unchangeable, like writing in pen instead of pencil.”
Using analogies, metaphors, and storytelling to make technical information relatable to non-experts: Analogies and metaphors are useful for making technical concepts easier to understand. Relate the concept to something familiar to your audience.
For example, you might compare a computer’s CPU to a brain, where the brain (CPU) processes information and makes decisions, helping the body (computer) function.
Storytelling can also be helpful, such as describing how a user interacts with a system from start to finish to show the impact of a new feature. For instance, “Imagine you’re ordering a pizza online. The front-end design is like the user-friendly app interface you see, while the backend processes make sure your order is correctly sent to the pizza shop.”
Tips and techniques:
- Break it down: Divide complex ideas into smaller, logical steps. Explain each step clearly before moving on to the next, making sure your audience follows along.
- Use relatable analogies: Choose analogies that are relevant to your audience’s experience. For example, use sports analogies for a sports enthusiast or business analogies for executives.
- Simplify your language: Avoid technical jargon unless necessary. Use simple, straightforward language and then check for understanding.
- Incorporate storytelling: Turn data or technical details into a narrative. For example, instead of explaining the intricacies of a database migration, tell the story of how the migration improved a client’s operations.
Questions to reflect:
- How do you currently simplify complex ideas when communicating with non-experts?
- Recall a time when your audience struggled to understand a technical concept. How could you have simplified your explanation?
- What are some of your go-to analogies or metaphors? How effective are they in helping others understand complex topics?
Exercise: Communication styles
TODO:
- Try to figure out another person’s behavior style (the two people exercise in the PDF).
- Given a prompt, try to understand the other person’s style.
- Chasen reads some text and everyone tries to guess what style the person embodies. Maybe have a volunteer for each style to figure it out.